One-time internet giant Yahoo announced a couple of days ago that hackers had stolen a huge quantity of login details, including passwords and security questions. The firm, valued a few years ago over $100bn but now worth a derisory $5bn (in a deal yet to be completed by Verizon) may be worth nothing after class actions for damages shred its financial status and its reputation.
have a Yahoo account but I couldn't care less about it. I use it merely
to login easily to some other websites - Flickr, Tumblr and Freecycle -
and could easily create new accounts for these if I needed to. I have
never stored any personal information or files on Yahoo or the
associated sites and the password on the account relates to Yahoo only.
You may wonder why I have not availed myself of the free email and other
services that Yahoo provides. I SAID, YOU MAY WONDER [I wonder why? Ed]. Yes, thanks Ed, I'm glad you asked. Draw up a chair and hearken to my tale.
was in the year 19.. that my story commences. I was only a country lad
helping out my father at the local abattoir when one misty night the
sinister footsteps of a man with no legs were to be heard on the cobbled
street outside. "Don't go and see who that is, the football's about to
come on" observed my father and so I never found out who he was. But
later that same year (or one very like it) I heard tell of this wondrous
new invention some folk called the Interweb and upon making enquiries
determined that I would create my own Interwebsite, and so I did. It was
crude, I grant you, but shapely to my eye and contained real
information that was nowhere else to be found, unlike the vast majority
of suchlike which held naught but links to yet other Interwebsites which
in turn held naught but links, and so on ad nauseum.
now my story takes a sinister turn. For no folk knew of my
Interwebsite; it was a secret because so many at that time determined
how to go about their web a-browsing by using Yahoo, which at that time
contained many links to other sites and was right popular on this
account. Humbly I made request that my own offering might be considered
worthy of inclusion. Neither reply nor listing was the outcome. I
pondered and tried again with similar result and then once more. And
thus, rejected in favour of others who peddled rubbish and
flim-flammery, I bided my time and brooded.
the year 20.. that rumours of strange beasts called search engines
reached our small village and upon investigation I found that even my
modest Interwebsite was recognised and listed, moreover in a place of
honour, and that many seekers after knowledge were aware of it, and that
I no longer needed Yahoo; indeed from that time on did its fortunes
decline until they reached the present slough from which they seem most
unlikely to be destined to be rescued. And serve them jolly well right.